I asked Karen is we could get a bed like this and the answer was quickly no. How shocked are you really?

If this was my bed, I would definitely install a CB Radio so I could talk to other car beds, or random truckers when I couldn’t sleep.

Hopefully someday I can have a bed like this for my son. Until then, a guy can dream.

[StanceWorks via Mayday Garage]

Clearly wanting to desperately be a Supra, the owner has grafted a horrible body kit onto this poor little Honda. Supra headlights and taillights have been installed along with two oversized fart cans. The hood appears to be carbon fiber with the finish wearing away. The body kit has horrible fit and finish with large gaps where the panels meet.

The interior has been dressed up with white leather and vinyl  and with a MOMO steering wheel as the finishing touch.

Sorry for hurting your eyes kids, I just had to share.

My buddy Bob found this *ahem* clearly modified 1971 Ford Mustang on eBay. I’m going to dump this into the, gee that looks familiar category.

Back in November of last year my buddy spotted a nearly identical car. I posted about it calling it a fail. Since that time my outlook on certain things has changed, and this is clearly a win.

Since November, it seems she has lost the bright orange paint, and looks to be sporting new exhaust tips. The seller does describe the modifications in the listing.

He says the only bad thing on the beast is a new headliner needs to be installed, which he has a new one for you. Oh, and the stereo has been removed. You’ll have to bring your headphones with you if you want to listen to Highway to Hell as you go tearin up the streets in this bad boy.

The starting bid is $10k, and apparently no one wants this fine piece of amazing.

[eBay]

This past weekend I ended up running an errand in my buddies 2010 Volkswagen GTI. The first thing I noticed was four buttons sitting in-front of the shifter. These four features are clearly things I need on future Federmobiles.

• Oil Slick: Pretty self explanitory. Push it and the car will create and oil slick puddle so the bad guys will crash.
• Missiles: Again, pretty self explanatory. Push to activate the heat-seeking missiles that will destroy that Toyota Corolla in front of you.
• Ludicrous Speed: This one is an interesting feature. Push the button and you will instantly be well above legal speeds. Think of it as NOS, but from the future.
• Eject: Well obviously this is for the ejector seat. You know that annoying kid you have to drive in the carpool? Yea, warn him if he doesn’t quiet down he’ll be taking a trip into the sky…

Yes, all of the above are awesome features in my buddies GTI. I love it. I can’t wait for the next Federmobile to have the above features.

Note: The above features are not real. The buttons have stickers on them. No children have ever been ejected from my buddies GTI.

As some of you learned late last night via my Twitter and Facebook stream, the armrest on the Chrysler 200 broke. Now before you get into the Imported From Detroit quips, I want to give some background on the situation.

A few weeks back I had the 2011 Dodge Avenger Heat in my driveway. It shares the same armrest design as the new 200. When operating normally, the armrest should slide back and forth. When it slides back it should lock into place with a click. When the 200 arrived on Monday the armrest slid freely with no click. Meaning the armrest never locked into place at any point.

This leads me to think that at some level the armrest was already broken to a degree. I believe me putting weight on the armrest last night was merely the straw that broke the 200′s back.

I received a call promptly this morning from my Chrysler rep after she learned of the situation. I actually offered to drive the car to a local dealership and have the armrest repaired.

Chrysler isn’t taking the situation lightly. It has asked me to stop driving the car and is sending someone up to take it back tomorrow. It is actually shipping it directly to Detroit, and having the 200 team look at it.

I am told this is the first time the 200 team has heard of anything like this happening. It is planning on doing a full investigation in an effort to determine what was the cause of the breakage.

Chrysler’s reaction is what impresses me. It seems to be very concerned as to why something like this would happen. Enough so that it would take the time to look at this specific press car in an attempt to determine what caused the break. Would every automaker do that if a part broke on a new press car? None the less an armrest? I’m not sure, but today Chrysler is, and that’s something to note.

I’m not even going to bother discussing what’s all part of this kit. For more pictures of this rolling catastrophe head over to GTspirit.

As some of you know, I sold my Jeep. Funny thing is, when I put it up for sale no decision had been made on its replacement. Now that the dust has settled and my Jeep will be going to its new owners this weekend, it is time to get serious about what my next vehicle will be.

Over the past three weeks I have narrowed the choices down. Some were impractical, while some were going to just be money pits. In the end some clear winners have emerged – unfortunately they are all so different and I am having trouble deciding. Each choice has an upside and of course, like everything else, a downside. Lets get right to it.

Current Contenders:

Jeep Grand Cherokee- Finalist

Yes, I am considering replacing my Jeep Grand Cherokee with another Grand Cherokee, though I would be going for a 2008 or newer with lower miles. The 2005 to 2007 models had some pretty low rent interiors. From 2007 to 2008 a diesel was available as an engine option. Not many were made and they are rare when looking for one used. Sadly, after doing the math the better mileage you get with the diesel fuel doesn’t add up with the difference in the price of gasoline. You merely break even. If I go the Grand Cherokee route I won’t lose any of the capabilities I am used to when it comes to cargo hauling, towing, and winter driving. I am already used to the craptacular gas mileage so there will be no real shock at the pump. In the end if I go with a Grand Cherokee I know what to expect, and I will someday hand it over to my fiancée Karen when it comes time for her to get another vehicle.

Dodge Charger SRT8- Finalist

I know what you are thinking, “um Joel, isn’t that a huge gas guzzler with a big 6.1-Liter HEMI V-8?” If that is what you were thinking, then yes you are correct. But know this, when I had the Charger SRT8 last spring for a week, I averaged similar gas mileage in the city as my Jeep, and slightly better on the highway. That means I won’t really have sticker shock at the pump, and I am already used to the frequency of filling up. The SRT8 is fun, loud, and comfortable. It is also quite large, which is nice if you are hauling around, say a child. If I go this route I would probably be looking for a 2008 or newer since they had a slight refresh on the interior in 2008 that ditched some of the low rent plastics. Sadly, gas prices are going to continue to rise, and I have to question if I will at some point get frustrated in the future with the SRT8 if I end up choosing it.

Subaru WRX Hatchback- Finalist

Notice this is a completely different direction from the two above choices? Quick run down of why this is a top pick. The Subaru WRX is fun, fast, handles well, has awesome all-wheel drive, and the hatchback has quite a bit of space. It would be terrific in the snow, get amazing gas mileage compared to my other choices, and still be a livable daily driver. This option does have me wondering how I will feel about it in four to five years…..will my love fade? Another question that comes to mind is if I will get tired of driving this with all the highway driving I do. It is not exactly a grand tourer and in reality has a lower rent compact car interior.

Mazdaspeed3- Barely A Finalist

Like the Subaru, we have another hot hatchback with similar gas mileage and cargo hauling capacity. The main difference comes in to the drivetrain. This is a front-wheel drive torque steering beast. This will not be as good in the snow as the WRX – it’s a plain fact. That doesn’t mean I still don’t want one.

Subaru Legacy GT Spec. B- Barely A Finalist

Hard to find is a good way to describe this option. They were originally a special edition model in 2006. For 2007 they became a regular production model, but they are still considered somewhat rare, and definitely special. In 2008 they lost the MOMO steering wheel and became a full fledged production model. I would be going for the 2007 if I had the option. It only came with a near-black exterior and a black and blue leather/alcantara interior. It had the WRX engine and WRX STI six-speed transmission. The problem is that these  hold their value.  As a used car , that doesn’t help its case against some of the other models, specifically a new WRX hatchback. The interior space, and trunk space, is within a few tenths of an inch as the current generation Impreza, which is what the WRX is based off of. Just not sure on this one. I keep going back and forth as to if it is a finalist. I love it’s rarity, but that makes it difficult to find.

Dodge Magnum SRT8- Barely A Finalist

Read the above paragraph regarding the Charger SRT8. All the same pros and cons, only with a ton of added functionality in the rear. The rarity of this model also makes it very cool.

Eliminated Contenders:

Challenger SRT8 -

Lord I want one of these. If I wasn’t getting married and probably going to have a kid before I get my next car, we wouldn’t be having this discussion. I would be buying one of these. But the reality is, I am getting married, and probably will have a kid before getting my next car. From what I am told by pretty much everyone, rear facing child safety seats are no fun. They are even less fun in a two-door.

Ford F-150 Raptor-

I have absolutely no reason to need one of these. In fact, it is probably the opposite of what I need. Still want one. Wont be getting one.

2001 Audi S8- This falls into the troubled money pit category. The transmission will go and I’ll have a nice bill to pay.

2000 BMW M5- Another money pit. The rear main seal will go, or a myriad of other components and I will have a rather large repair bill.

Jaguar XJR or S-Type R

The Jaguar XJR is a total sleeper. Made from aluminum it is fairly light for its size and with the right driver can be a ton of fun. The S-Type R for some reason always appealed to me. Both of these somewhat scare me for reliability. At least with the XJR I would never have to worry about it rusting.

1999 Mercedes-Benz E55- Man I’ve wanted one of these forever. Again, the money pit scenario.

There are some wild cards thrown into the mix such as a used Audi S4 Avant, Infiniti G37x, or BMW 335i. Though for the most part these vehicles seem to fall out of my price range, and so they have for the most part fallen off my radar for now.

For those that do not know exactly how I use a vehicle in my daily life, here’s a quick break down of my driving habits. Most of my summer driving is on the highway back and forth to my cabin. This is where I question how in love I will be with the WRX long term. During the week I do not actually drive much other than errands in the evening. Of course we do get some hairy winters here, so some (most) of these choices will be getting snow tires. And of course, we head to Iowa to visit my future in-laws quite often. So I would say most of my weekends are highway miles, and in town I maybe average 200 miles a week running around.

At the end of the day I have absolutely no clue what I want. As you can see above, I am completely all over the place. I was once told don’t buy something unless you are sure it is the right thing. I feel that is actually pretty good advice, which is why there isn’t a new vehicle in my driveway right now.

As I’m sure some vehicle has been left off the possible candidate list, please do leave your thoughts and suggestions in the comments below.

Everyone wants a Federmobile. The reason? It’s simple, I’m so ridiculously anal retentive about my vehicles. I fix crap that any normal person in their right mind wouldn’t even notice, none the less actually pay to fix.

So what happened? Well the short story is a friend from Michigan bought my Jeep. I am somewhat relieved to know it is going to a good home. I will be meeting them in Chicago sometime in the next few weeks to deliver the Jeep.

So what’s next for me? Frankly I have no clue. Karen (my fiancée) and I are in deep discussion about what will replace my vehicle. Over fifty percent of the vehicles I want just aren’t in the budget. Quite a few of the vehicles just aren’t approved by Karen due to the fact that she thinks I shouldn’t get a car (note actual car not SUV) that gets 13 mpg in the city. Of the vehicles that fit the budget, and I want, dear Karen feels about ninety percent of them are “ugly.” Girl thinks a vehicle like the WRX is ugly….

More to come on this topic as I try to figure out what will be the next Federmobile. Until then, if you see my Jeep wandering the streets of Michigan please do say hi for me. Or better yet, snap a picture and send it to me.

Anyone that knows me, knows how ridiculously anal I am about this thing. When it was purchased, I had new headlights installed, and immediately covered them in a clear shield. Along with the headlights, I also had a new windshield installed. At the time I didn’t own a carpet extractor, so I had the carpets professionally cleaned. Immediately Husky Liners were put in all four floor wells, and in the rear end. All four wheels were replaced with alloys from a Grand Cherokee Limited.

The oil has been changed every 4,000-5,000 miles with Mobile1 full synthetic. The exterior and interior has been detailed once to twice a year and the tires were rotated every 6,000 miles.

I have every receipt for everything done to this Jeep since I bought it with 68,000 miles. The tires are Michelin LTX M+S with more than 2/3 tread remaining. The rear differential was rebuilt at 150,000 miles. Both differentials, transfer case, transmission, and all other fluids were flushed every 30,000 miles, and I always used synthetic fluids. The brakes are slotted in the front with ceramic pads, while the rear rotors are slotted and drilled. All four shocks were replaced recently.

I also installed new HIDs for the low beams within the last few months. The HIDs are running off of a wiring harness connected to the battery. The high beams are Sylvania Silverstar Ultras.

It has an aftermarket cold air intake on it with a K&N filter. I cleaned and recharged the K&N filter yesterday.

The Jeep was just detailed (clayed and waxed) yesterday along with an oil change.

It currently has 172,xxx miles. It has maybe 3 door dings….literally the only thing it needs right now is two new hood struts.

You could say I am emotionally attached to this vehicle. There is no question that it is the best condition 1999 Grand Cherokee on the market, and possibly the best condition used Grand Cherokee of its generation. So spread the word.

[YouTube via Arthur Vogel, Willow Automotive]